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Anal
Play
As Masters and
Johnson
showed and
anyone who paid attention to what's going on with their body during an
orgasm knows, the anal musculature is totally involved in the orgasmic
contractions, which you can feel in your anus. They're exactly the
same:
the same rate and everything.
All orgasms are to some degree anal
orgasms;
you can't separate them. That's because the musculature in the pelvic
region
is all intertwined. The anal sphincter muscles are directly connected
to
the pelvic floor muscle, which goes throughout the pelvis.
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There is a myriad of anal
toys for all sorts of stimulation. You can find everything from the
basic butt plug to the elaborate erotic electro-stimulation
devices as well as vibrating anal toys. They come in a variety of
materials
like latex, silicone, pyrex and other compositions both rigid and/or
flexible
used for these toys. And some of them are designed in shapes specific,
such as the prostate
stimulation anal toys. A favorite for girl -on-girl or girl-on-guy
is the latest in "strapless" dildoes: The Share,
for example!
A butt plug has
a flared base, a narrow
area where the sphincter muscles would be, and then it widens out and
narrows again. It's flexible -
rigid but
flexible - and it's basically for anal stimulation. "Butt plug" refers
to the
shape where it goes in, near
the base,
so the sphincter muscles can kind of hold it in place. Some people like
to just leave them sit there -
during
sex or sometimes even when they're not having sex overtly.
Oh, and don't share
toys
(PERIOD!) ...
"thoroughly cleaning them in antibacterial soap solution or alcohol" is
safe enough for your
own personal toys, but never use them on someone
else
and vice-versa! It's so much less expensive to buy another toy, than to
experience the wrath of an STD (Sexually Transmitted Disease) or HIV
(Human
Immunodeficiency Virus) or worse!!
The
Biological Characteristics
There are two anal
sphincter muscles:
the
internal sphincter, which is on the inside, and the external sphincter,
which is on the outside. Now, it's important to know this distinction
for
anyone who's going to be an anal explorer. Because the external
sphincter
is under the central nervous system's control, most of us (unless we're
totally out of touch with the area) just by tuning in and sort of
deciding
to release can learn to relax the external sphincter quite easily. The
internal sphincter is controlled by the autonomic nervous system, so
you
may be able to relax the external sphincter and not be able to relax
the
internal one. It also seems to be the internal sphincter that stores up
tension and stress on a cumulative basis; the anus often becomes what I
call a tension zone - very similar to those of us who get the neck and
shoulder thing, or the back thing, or the stomach thing, or wherever
our
tension zone may be. That mainly shows up in the internal sphincter. It
really is the chronic internal sphincter tension that is a major, major
cause of hemorrhoids!
The external sphincter
does
have layers
to it, and kind of wraps around the internal sphincter; they're very
closely
linked together. The external sphincter is connected to the PC muscle,
the pubococcygeus, the one we exercise in Kegel exercises. It's
directly
connected. And so if these muscles are tense, then what is it doing to
our ability to enjoy orgasm when all those muscles that are supposed to
let go are chronically constricted? More exploration of anal sexuality
recommends doing Kegel exercises; we're not only toning up the whole
pelvic
floor (and the vaginal muscles in women), we're toning up the rectal
muscles,
and we're toning up the sphincters, and I think that is really going to
eliminate any prospects of getting too loose. When the big stuff is
inserted
without pain, the insertion is not accomplished through stretching;
it's
accomplished through relaxation. So you just go back to your normal
tonality
after you're done relaxing. People who want to enjoy anal sex should be
regularly doing their Kegels.
Be
Gentle... Go
Slowly...
Let's Talk First!
If you haven't had an
opportunity to
discuss
anal sexuality, whether or not you're interested in it personally, with
other people make a point of
it, because
it's going to make you more comfortable discussing it and putting it
into
words, even if you're already comfortable in your head. So we really
need
to know exactly how we feel about it as well as our play partner.
Sometimes
anal discussions and experiments can be a very nice part of a larger
process
of erotic self-discovery.
There's a big
distinction
between
performance
and pleasure-oriented goals. When people say, "I'd really like to be
able
to have anal intercourse because my partner wants it so much; I want to
be able to please him [or her]," that's performance. Pleasure, on the
other
hand, means, "I think there's something in this for me, I've gotten
hints
that this stimulation can feel good, I want to enjoy it more, and I
don't
want to be blocked in the ways that I am." The difference between the
motivations
of pleasure vs. performance strongly correlates with the outcome of
success,
the effectiveness and enjoyment of the entire process.
For those wanting anal
intercourse, the
first way to get "comfortable" is to experiment with a butt plug, which
come in a whole range of sizes. If the person is tense and/or new to
all
this, and uncomfortable, then obviously start with a small butt plug.
They're
a great way to begin, and should be inserted very gently and
lubrication
(Surgi-Lube
Jelly, is one of the
best)
is a must! For easy cleanup the water soluble lubes are good; for
prolonged
insertion of an object or a penis or whatever, usually a greasy, oily
lube
(WET, I-D, or one of the many others available) is needed for long
lasting
lubrication. As popular as "Crisco" or butter/margarine (Did anyone see
the movie, Last Tango in Paris?) are in many BDSM heavy fisting
and anal sex play communities, they're not highly recommended
as they may cause bacterial infections or allergic skin reactions from
their food-based chemical composition. Stick with the lubes designed
specifically
for this!
Enemas
for cleaning
(or
stimulation!)
Be aware that the
rectum is
not
normally
a storage area for feces; that's stored in the colon just above the
rectum.
When pressure builds up there's another sphincter leading into the
rectum
(at the top) that opens up, and then the feces start to descend thus
creating
the sensation to defecate. As we hold back the feces, by squeezing the
pubo-rectal sling and sphincter muscles, sometimes this will leave
traces
of it in the rectum (even after the bowel movement), but it is not the
storage area. However, before playing, fisting or even fucking, the ass
should be "cleaned"! This obviously, reduces the chances of
encountering
fecal matter during a hot and heavy intimate scene!
Anal
douching is
a quick and relatively easy method, but cleans only the lower rectum
area
near the opening, using a small nozzled bulb reservoir for flushing the
anus with warm water. Enemas
clean the
rectum
further up, by using the rubber enema-bag hot water bottles with the
hose
and nozzle on it, and just hang it up let gravity move the water. They
offer a higher volume of water and better cleaning. If you just use
warm
water with a small amount of salt, it doesn't seem to upset the natural
balance of bacteria nor does it irritate the lining. For more info on
enemas, read the Enema Library Section.
Insertion
Techniques
If there's going to be
intercourse or
insertion
of objects or a hand or whatever, then we're getting into the rectum.
The
rectum is not a straight tube. It's not the same in everyone -
obviously,
everyone's a little different on everything - but generally it takes
two
major curves along its length. There's the descending colon, then
there's
that S-shaped sigmoid colon just up above the rectum, and then the anal
opening. A muscle called the pubo-rectal sling anchors to the pubic
bone
on one side, goes around and wraps behind the back of the rectum, and
comes
back and anchors on the pubic bone in the front and the other side. It
supports the rectum, and its other function is that it's responsible
for
the majority of our ability to hold back having a bowel movement even
if
we need to. It's not mainly the sphincters that do that job; it's
mainly
the job of the pubo-rectal sling, but the pubo-rectal sling can also
become
chronically tense.
As far as inserting an
object or a
penis
into the rectum, if done so at a wrong angle it will run into the wall
just before the first rectal curve, and you're going to get a lot of
pain.
Some people try anal sex experimentally without learning about it
first;
they'll identify the pain of trying to go through the constricted
sphincters
(and that's pretty excruciating), but some will say that after they
learned
how to relax the sphincters they still feel a pain deeper inside - and
that's it. That's what it is in almost every case, and this problem is
exaggerated when you have excess tension in that pubo-rectal sling.
For anal play in
general
just try this
basic approach: awareness, breathing, touch, looking, gentle finger
insertion,
and self-exploration, is a wonderful process for those who are
recovering
or even trying to recover from anal medical problems or surgeries,
start
with gentle external massage in warm tubs of water.
An indirect effect of
anal
spasm that
may
have nothing to do with sex is anxiety. One of the things to keep in
mind is that anal muscle
tension is very
primitive. It operates on the survival level, very much part of the
fight-or-flight
response. A lot
of people who have various anxiety disorders are keeping themselves on
a hair-trigger where anything can set them off into anxiety, and are
partly
maintaining it by having their anuses chronically tied up. Combined
with
the other things you would do, this is a major adjunct to effective
work
with anxiety disorders.
Fisting
and Fingering
Fisting refers
to the
insertion
of
several fingers, sometimes the whole hand, and sometimes even the
forearm
as well, into the rectum. If it involves the forearm, then the fingers
are making their way into the lower colon; they're going beyond the
rectum.
This activity has maintained a strong popularity. Of course it's a
minority
activity and I suspect always will be, because even most of us who are
relaxed, still can't do the fisting thing and yet others just prefer
not
to try it at all. Yet a lot of
people find that
fisting
is the most intense erotic experience they've ever experienced in their
lives. They say it brings them an incredible sense of oneness with the
person doing it to them, and that it's a form of meditation.
Fisting and
postillioning
(using the
fingers
for anal insertion) takes time, patience, slow methodical movements and
plenty of lubrication. Many people feel they get into altered states of
consciousness and just have incredible experiences, sometimes without
any
genital involvement whatsoever - intense orgasmic experiences.
Handballing
is another term for fisting. These are the real fisting enthusiasts,
who
want to just get bigger and further. Again, fisting is a long term play
practice... that takes time! Caution is advised for those new to trying
it!!
Many people really
enjoy
fingering:
either
their own finger on the external anal opening, usually as part of
masturbation, or inserting the
finger
as part of masturbation. It also works well for couples and partners,
as
they
do it to each other, or one on
one.
Fingering
also requires lube
for ease of
insertion
and just like any anal play, to prevent bacterial transmission
from
any remnant fecal matter, use latex
gloves!
There's also oral-anal
contact, which
is
popularly called "rimming" (referring to "around the rim" of the anal
opening).
The concern with anal-oral contact is not HIV, particularly. We're
really
concerned about parasites and Hepatitis A. This is a major route of
transmission.
The risk can be reduced rather drastically by washing the area, but a
lot
of people who like rimming like the natural smells of the area. They
don't
want it squeaky-soapy clean; that's a turn-off. It's not
recommended
to do casually, certainly! However, rimming with those of whom you've
known
long enough to have some idea about their health situation. But, in
reality,
it's hard to know who's carrying parasites around, or Hepatitis A.
Using a dental
or oral dam is the best alternative for safe rimming play!
Guys and
Gals alike
like...
let's face it! -we both have one!
There are many sources
of
pleasure when
it comes to anal and rectal stimulation: an incredibly rich supply of
nerve endings all around the anal
opening! The rectum is a little bit like the inner part of the vagina,
responding more to pressure and not quite as surface sensitive. In
males
you have the bulb of the penis terminating in the perineal area right
next
to the anus, and it is actually anchored to the same muscle that the
external
sphincter is anchored to. I think that guys often get a lot of indirect
stimulation on the inner part of their penis; things are getting moved
around. Women are talking more about just what the boundaries are of
the
whole clitoral body; it's much bigger than most of us think, and
there's
lots of indirect stimulation there, too.
Lots of guys love prostate
massage and stimulation and say it intensifies their ejaculation;
many
love the feel of it and some don't. Keep in mind that women who
like
anal stimulation are every bit as enthusiastic about it as men who like
anal stimulation. The prostate may be a factor for men, as may that
prostatic-like
tissue in the G-spot
zone for women. Men can "tune into" their prostate by
stimulating it
with
their longest finger, inserting it all the way, moving it toward the
front
of the body, and then gently rubbing. Especially if they do that during
masturbation in the sustained plateau phase where they're highly
aroused,
the prostate is going to be enlarged and kind of hard and lumpy. You
can
feel it very easily, and then you can rub it to see if you like that
feeling,
whether it affects your ejaculation, or whatever.
Obviously with all
anal
play and anal
experimentation,
it's necessary to be safe-sex-conscious and to follow the safe, sane
and
consensual practices, so that it carries over in, during, and through
the
moments of highest passion. It's vital to your pleasure, health and
life!
Use condoms, dental dams and latex or poly gloves whenever exposing
yourself
or a partner to bodily fluids!
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Compiled
and edited
by
Medical Toys with thanks to Dr. Jack A. Morin, author of "Anal
Pleasure, Anal Health" for much of the information in this Library
Section. Click here for "Dr. Morin's
Basic Rules for Anal Sex"
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